March 7, 2017
Tom Truther - Editor
In an unprecedented show of force, James Comey ordered the FBI to raid Mar-a-lago. Upon entering Trumps private estate they found a large golden file cabinet filled to the brim with Trump's Russian businesses. The most concerning business - a car-wash empire in Moscow - ran by sending American Muslims to Russia as an alternative to being deported to Iraq. When asked about the plan Trump's Russian Business partner, Alexi Sergachev, had this to say, "We thought it was a great plan. We get free workers, and America gets rid of its' Muslim problem. They either come here, or go back to Iraq." We sat down with Kellyanne Conway at a Washington D.C. Star-bucks to get Trumps side of the story. Once she had her feet properly propped up on the couch she told us, "Go away, I think the microwave over there is watching us. You should buy an Ivanka handbag." Clearly we are not getting any answers from the Trump administration, but we look forward to the Presidents comments some time in the early morning via Twitter. To keep up to date on this story and others like it, please like, follow, and share us on Facebook and Twitter.